Friday, June 11, 2010

-My Girl-

Heave a light sigh
muscles relax
leaning against you
I collapse

Finding comfort
in your voice
my protection
from all this noise

Chaotic wonder
this world of ours
hidden behind walls
where I am yours

Passionate secret
in shadows we hide
when we show ourselves
you decide

Stress induced
screaming fights
but I know
we'll survive
Dracier 2010

-Proven-

I was so stupid
to believe you would stay
habit showed you'd leave me
but I'm still here today

Funny how we thought
that you'd be the one hurt
I'm holding my heart in my hands
sadly this isn't a first

I can't believe i'm still hoping
masochist to the extreme
I love how we always thought
I'd be the one to leave

Yet again I'm the scapegoat
so stupid, but I believed...
am I so dispensable
just that easy to leave?

I should have seen it coming
allowed myself to be blind
I had always been so careful
but now i'm left behind

I would have given everything to you
I really would have stayed
I've never showed this much before
I guess this is my price to pay
Dracier 2009

-Miserable-

I'm screaming
I'm breaking
as everything goes wrong

I'm cracking
I'm losing
the wait seems so long

I'm crying
I'm waking
with tears in my eyes

I'm hoping
I'm cringing
with every goodbye

I'm whimpering
I'm hurting
deeper go the cracks

I'm stupid
I'm fading
this night will be my last
Dracier 2009

-Poetry-

I find it almost funny
that depression is a muse
what we write when we're unhappy
is by far the best

Just look at my painful creations
even in betrayal she's my muse
in pain and suffering is creation
for everyone else to see

How poetic is it
to be hung by her tye
poetry embodies sadness
there is a beauty as she cries

How morbid our thoughts reach
greatness in a minds collapse
it is a terrible way to think
all these memories brought back

The greatest poets were masochists
hating themselves in their art
trade a scar for a pretty word
I guess I should find it bizarre
Dracier 2009

-Sailor-

Tossing turning
crying screaming
tearing breaking
flailing pacing

Don't read the words
she'll hurt you again
taken to a new place
time to begin

Don't give a fuck
what people see
as you cry so loudly
just leave her be....

Her heart is cracking
all the way through
pieces are falling
those wounds wont heal

She's falling, she's losing
I cannot hold on
she's hurting, she's choking
I cannot move on

It's stinging, I'm screaming
bruises grace these lips
I'm tumbling, I'm trembling
remembering her kiss

I wanted, I waited
she's broken her word
the voices, the reasons
nothing is heart

I'm falling, I'm failing
save me from this mess
she's hurting me, breaking me
say's it's for the best
Dracier 2009

-Doubles-

The feel of the flesh
so fragile so weak
the longing so fresh
fears settle so deep

Aware, aware
my attention is drawn
so scared, so scared
of losing the one

Just thoughts, just thoughts
everyone says
Distraught, distraught
it tears through my head

Thus thus, thus thus
my heart races fast
bang bang, bang bang
gunshots could bring lasts

Slipping, slipping
controls out of grasp
crying, crying
from so many lasts
Dracier 2009

-Torn-

Star dazzling brightness
as weakness portrays
wish no one will find us
forever we stay

Hope for us, wish for us
return her to me
just minutes, just hours
she is what I need
Dracier 2009

-Crash-

Screaming metal
broken glass
burning rubber
turned to ash

Twisted pieces
whispered lasts
closed eyes
breaking crash

Lost control
fear unleashed
collapse to snow
hold tight

Stay awake
dreams relapse
memories haunting
cars crash
Dracier 2009

-Broken or Damaged?-

My pillow is marked
with tears that i've cried
while thinking at night
about you

Stiff in parts
and white in others
from the crystalline residue
silicone and sorrow

Edging away from comforts
kind words burning deep
breaking hearts and causing pain
all me

Tailored words and hidden screams
I promise I wont show you
mistakes and abandon
now I'm lost
Dracier 2008

-Lovely-

Bright orange bag
loose white tee
black white short shorts
you're the only one it could be

Chest tightens
tears emerge
keep on breathing
this is absurd!

Spare me a look
even a glance
eyes straight ahead
no second chance

I want to be angry
so I can stop this hurt
but your back is turned
diminish my worth

Isn't it lovely?
I told you it fits
try to look away
try to get a grip
Dracier 2009

-Choices Of Who?-

So many paths
which one should I follow
so many people
I'm feeling so shallow

Choice of one
distance in between
gorgeous like none other
she means the world to me

Choice of two
convenience galore
beauty with lips dying to kiss
possibilities there to explore

Choice of three
unpredictable tomorrow
craving with past feelings so strong
drama sure to follow

So many paths
which one should I follow
so many people
I'm feeling so shallow
Dracier 2008

-Spent Heart-

One piece for the first one
one piece for the tormentor
one piece for the addict
one piece for the mentor

One piece for the dramatic
one piece for the blonde
one piece for the liar
one piece for the gone

One piece for the poet
one piece for the glam
one piece for the misleading
one piece for the damned

One piece for the obsession
one piece for the new
one piece for the mama
one piece for the through

One piece for the beautiful
one piece for the between
one piece for the addiction
i've forgotten a piece for me...
Dracier 2008

-I Tried-

You wanted someone to sweep you off your feet
that's exactly what I did
such a profound feeling at first times
excitement boiling silently beneath

I cry because of you
I cry in spite of you
I cry to please you
I cry to show you

I told myself I would do everything for you
letting myself believe it would last
risking myself without a doubt
so content to be allowed no change

I cry to love you
I cry to hate you
I cry to prove to you
I cry to show you

I cry to show you me
Dracier 2007

-Uncertain-

Unknown tears shine on pale cheek
snot letting anyone see
hidden pain and confusion
forcing a smile for all to see

A blade so close to flesh
but refusing to let it touch
no more weakness from razors
all will be done by thy own hand

blood falls to the floor slowly
velvet red pools form satisfyingly
one last time for the liquid inside
a single time to satisfy the crave

Unknowing why it's happening
confusion now reigning supreme
turning to one of many outlets
not knowing when it all began
Dracier 2005

-Questions-

Is it enough to keep is together?
that is what you asked
the truth is I have no idea
we will see what comes to pass

I sit and watch our story
unfolding page by page
both of us trying to be cautious
both of us scared of the pain

There are times I wish I could give up
and just let everything go
when everything is just a standard
there are so many thoughts you don't know

It started off as an interest
now it's growing to so much more
there are times that I find myself asking
just what are we fighting for?

Dracier 2008